Amazon Best Seller Five Years In a Row*!
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"This book is worth a course of therapy! It is for anyone who has ever been weighed down by the delusion that sheer will and control could deliver a desired outcome. Through compelling case histories, Mr. Miller presents universal examples of the costs of this kind of disordered thinking, and step by step, shows us the way out. “Losing Control, Finding Serenity” is the missing link to uncovering the true wisdom of the Serenity Prayer.."
Barbara LaSalle, MFT
Author of Finding Ben
“Miller’s insight into letting go allows people to become truly who God intends them to be and therefore more fully human.”
Rev.Cannon Normans S. Hull
The Gift of Acceptance
About the Book
ForeWord Reviews Book of the Year Award Finalist
What Would Your Life Be Like If You Simply Let Go of Control?
At work, they oversee every detail of every project and expect nothing less than perfection from their coworkers.
At home, they obsess over finding the “right” person. Then, they criticize their lover or spouse for doing everything wrong.
As parents, they practice zero tolerance for their children’s preferred study practices, choice of friends, dress choices, and differing life views.
Sound familiar? Everyone knows the type: micromanagers, nitpickers, and domestic despots. Yet, most people fail to recognize the signs of a compulsion to control in themselves—or realize the toll of their behavior on their career, their family, their friendships, and their own happiness.
In Losing Control, Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control Hurts Us and How to Let It Go Daniel A. Miller pinpoints the dangers of excessive control. What’s more, he shows those who feel the pressure to control how to break free and reap unexpected gifts.
Sharing his journey of transformation, Miller reveals what happened when he finally decided to “surrender”: his blinders fell away, new opportunities emerged, and he experienced unprecedented, profound inner peace.
Drawing on psychological insights, spiritual wisdom, and the real-life stories of acknowledged “control freaks,” Losing Control, Finding Serenity guides readers through an honest inventory of their control patterns—whether prodding, cajoling, withdrawing, playing the martyr, or intimidating—down to the roots. As most controllers will discover, their compulsion to control is provoked by deep-seated fear, anxieties, and insecurities, then aggravated by anger and resentments.
Filled with enlightening true stories, Losing Control, Finding Serenity gives readers the knowledge, the courage, the strategies, and the “decontrol” tools to:
- Identify and overcome the control triggers of fear, anger, and resentment
- Become a less domineering parent, build a family democracy, and reduce the struggles with children.
- Find and keep the right person by accepting who he or she is rather than trying to change their romantic partner.
- Free your creative flow and process.
- Delegate to and trust coworkers to reap increases in productivity, efficiency, and job satisfaction—and reduce conflict and dissension.
- Learn to be patient and calmly accept “what is,” even when adversity strikes, to enjoy a more fulfilling and serene life.
- Reduce Co-Dependency.
In a chaotic, unpredictable world that’s frequently beyond anyone’s control, Losing Control, Finding Serenity offers welcome encouragement and validation for going with the flow of life as it is: an ongoing, every changing mystery.
Find out how losing control really means gaining control.
Critical Acclaim For the Book
“Daniel A. Miller has done an amazing job in delving deeply into the crevices of how most us would need to be in control, one way or another—in varying degrees—not always realizing how it rules and affects our lives and even more so—the lives and happiness of others. Daniel has clearly lived it, seen the damage, and has learned from it and has designed a formula to teach people how to change these controls by finding, understanding and releasing issues one step at a time. He has created a way of guiding and educating the reader, in a very understandable and logical way, to help everyone “Let Go”. A must read for everyone!—IN LIGHT TIMES (June, 2011)